Get to know saucy air hostess Pam Ann, alter ego of Australian comedienne Caroline Reid, whose latest solo show, Cockpit, lands this month at NYC’s XL Cabaret.
By Brandon Voss
1. What turns you on, creatively or otherwise?
Pam Ann: Air investigation turns me on!
2. What’s a good tip for someone who wants to be you for Halloween?
Set yourself on fire.
3. Which celebrity’s hair do you covet most?
Elizabeth Taylor from the Burton years.
4. What would your death-row last meal be?
A big bag of cocaine.
5. What’s your juiciest vice or guiltiest pleasure?
Cocaine.
6. What extravagant purchase should probably make you feel guiltier?
Buying an Airbus A380.
7. When’s the last time you wanted to slap someone?
When a passenger in coach asked me for a glass of water. It’s not about “wanted to slap” — I did slap them and then I nailed their hands to the armrest.
8. What most likely made that stain on your outfit?
The baby on board when it threw up over me after I’d given it too much Ketamine in its milk.
9. Describe your favorite undergarment.
Underpants bombs are fun.
10. What’s a lie you’ve told more than once?
We have to make an emergency landing.
BONUS: Where do you see yourself in five minutes?
Face down in a pillow with a cock in my ass.
DLNQNT, May 2012.